


Birthday Play

by AlexC



Category: Batman - Fandom
Genre: :D, Birthday, Birthday Presents, Crazy Birthday Plan, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Happy Birthday Red!!!, Have A Great One!, I Don't Even Know, I Love You, I Saw Three Ships, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Implied Slash, M/M, OOC warning, Please Forgive Me For Any Ghastly Errors, Psychopaths In Love, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, Very Important: I Have No Clue About Anything In This Fandom But I Did My Best And I Hope It's Ok, i hope you like this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-06-19
Packaged: 2018-04-05 03:27:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4163955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexC/pseuds/AlexC
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Joker is all about chaos and fun. Usually it ends negatively and that is why the caped crusader comes rushing in. But not tonight!<br/>Tonight is a special night. This night, started at the stroke of midnight, and ending at 11:59 pm the next night, Joker has decided to focus all his attention on a specific person. His beloved, Jessica.<br/>What crazy plan does he have in store for her?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Birthday Play

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Trixy_BuenaSuerte](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trixy_BuenaSuerte/gifts).



> This is dedicated to a special person in my life: my platonic soul mate, and forever best friend, Red!

Flames lick the docks and warehouses up and down as the distinct sound of wood cracking under heavy weight can be heard streets over. A bright blaze fills the air and gives the dark town an ever lovely warm color to the spectators on the chilly waters and above the abandoned buildings.

Not long after the chaotic sounds of police cars and fire trucks start heading all over the South side, a cluster of buildings in Rodbinsville soon explode with blue fireworks loudly cracking overhead. Then across the city, in the east section of Gotham University, more buildings explode, this time with short rapid bursts of Red fireworks shooting up above.

A low song starts to thrum on every street between the two points. What sounds like a two string repetition with a clacking noise at the end of the section repeats over and over. A couple of repetitions of this, and the deep bass noise of a kick drum soon starts in.

Some purple fireworks go off above Robinson Park just as words resound over the city.

_“They say it’s your birthday!”_

_“We’re gonna have a good time!”_

It’s a spectacular show, even for the annoyed residents’ standards, and for once, there seems to be only damage in locations that no one enjoys visiting.

Children run to their windows and watch with rapt attention as the sky changes color again and again, and some lost adults wonder just in the hell is happening.

Batman looks out the window of his mansion, and scans for the usual Bat symbol for when he’s needed, but is shocked to find that it’s not there.

“Alfred, have they put the Bat signal out at any point?” Bruce questions, still looking around in disbelief.

Alfred only steps forward, and with a discreet bow replies, “Not at all, sir. They seem to be fine on their own for tonight.”

And with a sly smirk he adds, “Though, Mr. Kent certainly seems to be… available. If I didn’t know any better, his dozens of calls only hours ago would be an indication that he very urgently wanted to see you tonight. Alas, young master, you seem too preoccupied with wanting to put your mask on instead of other more relaxing activities...”

At that, Bruce Wayne immediately perks up and mumbles about how maybe there’s something wrong, and that he must _definitely_ check on Clark at his home. Alone. Because who knows, maybe Clark needs help with something but is just too embarrassed to ask anyone else for help.

Alfred pretends to not notice how Bruce’s eyes get a dark look to them as he licked his lips, and pretends to not notice the way Bruce’s stance is a few steps wider than usual as he walks. It’s almost as if something is starting to become uncomfortable in his pants.

_‘Better hope Master Bruce can help Mr. Kent before anyone_ else _notices a certain problem,’_ Alfred thinks to himself with a dark chuckle.

No, no one is worried about this odd light show at the stroke of midnight. In fact, they are all enchanted by it. As the seconds tick by, and as the lights flare up in the sky, a mindless smile grows on every viewer’s visage.

But one viewer in particular refuses to crack. She refuses to admit defeat, and only nods as she makes sure to keep her chin up and stare this crazy, green-haired lunatic straight in the face.

“Jessica, come now. You know you like it.”

An annoyed huff can be heard from the floor below, and it can be no other than Joker’s ex, Harley Quinn. There should be no reason for her to be upset though. She’s officially with Ivy at the moment, and she even helped plan this little surprise for the petite little thing that Joker had grown quite fond of during the past couple of bank robberies. If Joker hadn’t gotten his hands on her first, Harley sure would have loved to take a bite out of her first. But what Puddin likes, Puddin gets.

Back in the room above, Joker takes a step closer as Jessica quirks an eyebrow up, refusing to give. He squints his eyes at her as he points before speaking again.

“You _will_ admit this is the best birthday surprise anyone has given you, and that’s final,” he says, waggling a finger at her suggestively.

She bites back a laugh as she monotonously agrees, “Yes, this is the most _fantastic_ birthday surprise anyone has ever done for me. Is that all?”

Joker is frustrated! He made sure not to hurt anyone because he wanted a normal present for her. At least, as normal as he could give. But unfortunately for her, all he knew was chaos and crazy.

His initial plan was to hold the mayor and his cabinet hostage until they agreed to make all the Korean barbeque restaurants in the area give her free food, but Harley pointed out that then people would think she was associated with him.

_“And, le’s be honest Puddin. All us girlies who are attracted to you don’t end up bein treated very well by others. Namely your boy toy, Batsy.”_

Harley’s words had rung very true in his ears, but the idea that Batman would meet her, that he would treat Jessie bad, now _that_ got his blood boiling in a way that was very uncharacteristic of him.

Ivy had tried to tell him he was just jealous.

_“You’re not even mad, dear. You’re just worried she’ll like him more and getting jealous before the fact.”_

But the psychotic side of him refused to believe it.

_‘I’m coo-coo! I don’t get jealous!’_

The next ideas had ranged anywhere from recreating some of her video games to finding real life Assassins and Templars in Gotham City. Joker’s search hadn’t been as successful as he hoped, but there was one funny fellow he still had chained up somewhere so that his beloved could tell him whether that small man was one of these two groups.

_‘I should feed him, now that I think about it,’_ part of his brain mumbles subconsciously.

Yet, he ignores it to deal with the matter at hand. It’s been over half an hour, and Jessie _still_ is trying to pretend that this surprise isn’t the most amazing gift anyone has single handedly pulled off!

All it takes would be a grin at his handy work, but she’s fighting it. He can see her!

In her defense, she doesn’t like it when he gets too cocky. It certainly sets ablaze the lower part of her stomach, but she doesn’t like letting him know. The few times she didn’t stop a compliment from getting to his head, he got stuck in Arkham Asylum for a good couple of weeks before escaping again because his cockiness spread to all parts of his life. The weeks he was away were the most boring—and kind of lonely—weeks of her life. But she did get back to playing her video games during that time since she wasn’t busy being pulled into some crazy scheme that involved freezing people into perpetual laughs.

She crosses her arms over her chest and turns away from Joker as she says, “Yes, it _is_ pretty awesome.”

As she hears the sounds of some Pitch Perfect songs she really likes and a bit of “Shake It Off” echoing over different parts of the city, her fight to keep a smile off starts to diminish. Yet at the last second, she stops herself. But not before Joker notices her amused smirk.

“Ha!” he yells in triumph.

“Yes! I knew you’d like it!” With that, he runs, grabs her by the waist, and spins her around in circles.

The sudden motion catches her off guard, but seeing his genuine smile is infectious. Before she knows it, she’s laughing that gentle, ringing laugh of hers along with the boisterous, deep laugh of his.

On instinct, Joker sets her down and pulls her in for a deep kiss.

It’s the most romantic thing he’s ever done.

Well, normal romantic. He’s done some pretty crazy shit in attempt to be romantic, but this one is now her favorite.

Becca’s voice singing, “Don't you forget about me, As you walk on by, Will you call my name,” begins to play in the back.

They are near a window as he looks lovingly into her eyes, and with another passionate, gentle kiss, Becca loudly sings, “I say la lalalala lalalala lalalala lalalala!”

At that, the crescendo of the fireworks goes off right outside their window in a flurry of purple and red and green.

Ivy and Harley come running up just in time to catch this picture perfect moment that slowly ends outside for the rest of the city, but somehow the music continues inside of the building.

“Jessica, quick!” Harley exclaims after the resounding “aww” from the lesbian couple a minute ago stops.

She looks at the duo in the doorway perplexed as she responds with a confused, “huh?”

Ivy pulls up her red laptop adorned with bright green leaves. The screen is open and the words _“Tonight, I will love love you tonight,”_ comes blaring out of the speakers.

Joker scrunches his eyebrows up as she asks, “more Pitch Perfect music?”

Ivy and Harley’s eyes light up as the next words come through. _  
“Give me everything tonight,”_

Quiet moans and whimpers come through as the verse begins to end. Suddenly a door slams open. _  
“For all we know we might not get tomorrow.”_

There on the screen are none other than the rich playboy, Bruce Wayne and the mysteriously allusive journalist, Clark Kent. Jackets followed by ripping off of the buttoned shirts, and then pulling off the annoying undershirts beneath that are quickly in progress.

Jessica’s eyes widen in surprise by what she sees on the screen, and once her eyes land on the naughty duo in front of her, some comments from the previous weeks before click.

Ivy had mentioned that her some of her spores worked as very powerful aphrodisiacs.

Harley had mentioned that it really wasn’t that hard to find out the identities of some super heroes.

Jessica had already contributed her belief that Batman was obviously Mr. Wayne. But boy was she surprised to see that glasses really did make a difference on certain people’s appearance.

(But maybe it was also the confidence level.)

“Happy birthday!” they both sang out to her as the pulled her to sit and set the laptop on her lap.

Joker lets out a strangled sounded huff, upset that the girls were trying to outdo him, but Jessica sure didn’t seem upset by Plan SuperBats ( _whatever that means_ ) coming to fruition…

Jessica didn’t need to hear the next words of the song to know what was going to happen next. Yet, like magic, they came on at just the right time.

_“Let’s do it tonight!”_

**Author's Note:**

> Happy birthday to the most awesome, talented, amazing best friend in the whole wide world!!! I love you lots, Red!  
> Sorry about the plans, but I hope this can sort of make up for it a bit...  
> (I've been trying to do this for a while, but I had trouble... Sorry that it was OOC and stuff... >.


End file.
